Feb 10

Top 10 Ways To Love Your Husband

Top 10 Ways To Love Your Husband

by Melissa Taylor

10.  Tell him every day that you love him.  Every day.  At least 3 times a day.  Speak it. Text it. FaceBook it.  Tweet it.  But make sure he hears it and he knows it.

9.  Do something for him in secret.  Don’t worry about getting credit for it or if he notices.  Just keep it between you and the Lord.  Find joy in doing something kind or helpful, yet secretive for him.

8.  Have sex with him. (I know you just rolled your eyes at me!)  Blunt:  yes.  Unnecessary:  no   Most men need this from their wives and most women are often too exhausted to have this at the top of their priority list.  You know your man better than anyone else.  Only you can give him the gift of you.  Share yourself with your husband and ask the Lord to bless the bed of your marriage.

7.  Read The Husband Project by Kathi Lipp and dedicate 21 days to loving your man with purpose and intention.  This book blessed me, my husband and our marriage so much! I was especially surprised by how I fell more in love I felt while going through the projects. Grab a few girlfriends and do this together! That’s what I did. I loved it so much that it’s the next Proverbs 31 Online Bible Study. (The study begins June 20, 2016- why don’t you join me?)

6.  Read 1 Corinthians 13 and write down the qualities of love mentioned in this chapter.  Ask yourself:  Do I love my husband this way?  Then ask God to give you His supernatural ability to love.  Because I’ll just say it plain and simple, there is nothing natural about love. It’s not a feeling, it’s an action…one you have to decide to have and give.

5.  Date him.  If he’s not into planning a date, then do it yourself.  Make time for your relationship away from the grind and routine of every day life.  This doesn’t require money, it only requires time.  My last date with my husband took place at our home.  We had dinner alone and listened to our favorite music.  We gave each other massages.  We did some other things too, but I’ll skip that part!  We ended the night by watching a movie in bed together.  He said it was the perfect date!   On another date, we met for lunch while the kids were in school.  Once we sat on our back patio and cooked out together.  Every date is different and depends on the circumstances, but I personally think this is vital to a marriage.

4.  Allow your husband to overhear you telling someone something great about him!  Compliment him in front of your family and/or friends.  Never speak negatively of him in front of  others.

3.  Learn your husband’s love language.  Often the biggest barrier in a marriage relationship is just failing to know the way you and your spouse like to give and receive love.  Sadly, my husband and I didn’t learn this until we had been married 18 years.  My #1 love language was his #6.  His #1 love language was my #6.  Think we had a problem here?  Uh huh.  But it wasn’t a problem that couldn’t be worked on.  We just both needed to apply effort in the way we gave love to each other.  (Love Languages:  Words: written or spoken, Touch:  non sexual, Touch:  sexual, Quality time, Gifts, Acts of service)

2.  Forgive yourself for anything in your past that may keep you from loving your husband completely.  Forgive your husband the same. It’s never too late to start anew.

1.  Pray for your husband.  Make this your #1 priority in your marriage.  Even if you don’t feel like it, do it anyway.  Too often prayer is considered what you do when all else fails.  Maybe all else wouldn’t fail if we prayed first.  Just sayin’….

This post is dedicated in honor of my husband, Jeff.  Today is our 20th wedding anniversary. I love you sweetheart! Thanks for being patient with me as I learn each year how to love you even better. The best is yet to come!



  1. Congratulations on your Anniversary, i love this post good advice there sister in Christ. God bless.

  2. Melissa;
    I’m posting this to our Woman’s Ministries Facebook page! SOOO very good.

  3. What great words of truth that I need to hear! Love your heart!! Oh and I love you and Jeff …. not to mention my dear sweet hubby!

  4. Melissa R. says:

    Happy Anniversary! Uplifting, encouraging, and helpful like always! Thanks for sharing. :)

  5. Happy Anniversary Melissa and Jeff.

    Melissa, thank you for this challenge. God is using you!
    PS. Just sent you an e-mail :)

  6. Thank you for this list :) My husband deploys to Iraq this week and now more than I ever I am realizing how much I appreciate him. I look forward to reading the book you recommended and putting this list into action!

  7. 20 years! Wow! Congratulations. What a journey you two must have had together. I admire so deeply people that stick together through thick and thin (and there has to be that!) when it’s so easy to give up. I agree with EVERY point you say. EVERY single one. You’ve recharged my resolve to work on my marriage. I’ve only been married 6 years (10 years together) and we have a 3 yo and I know we’re deeply in love but we’ve fallen into a rut of taking each other for granted I think. We definitely do not make the effort to make time for each other and well our pillow talk is minimal. I often fall back on “well why doesn’t he initiate a date?” but you reminded me that I’ve just gotta do it. And I’m glad you put #1 as pray. Oh if only I can resolve and stick to doing all of these…oh my, what a difference I know it would make. I’m going to try. I really am.

  8. Happy Anniversary Melissa! I love this! I am going to link my blog to this page today. I think it is so important that we make our marriages a priority. I had a women tell me something today about her marriage that just made me cringe. We have to give our husband’s the respect that God commands in His Word. When we do He will honor us and we will in turn receive the love we need and our lives will be so much more blessed and our marriages so much more fulfilling when we do it God’s way. Sometimes it takes doing it the wrong way for a long time to really get it, I am glad I understand now :)


  9. What great reminders, Melissa! Thank you! You are a great wife and a great example! I especially loved the date ideas. I am going to be more purposeful about this! mel

  10. Melissa, thanks so much for this post (and all your posts). I especially love the wonderful and helpful lists you give us from time to time and this one is no exception. I have saved it for future reference.


  11. Happy anniversary! I loved your post!

  12. Happy Anniversary. This post made me incredibly sad as I am nearing the end of a 19 year marriage. I got married for life, he did not and eventually you just have to release someone that does not want to be held. But what makes me the saddest is knowing I did not love my husband the best I could. I am not want for regret for all things happen for a reason and like I said he did not want to be held but perhaps if I had tried a little harder it wouldn’t be ending. :-(
    I am however printing this blog as a reminder of the love I MUST give to my husband the next time around…and I am convinced there will be a next time around because God has given me that sign.

  13. Thank u Melissa for the challenging truth. God is helping.